Love past the Hate
This is a post for my adopted niece.My “niece” is the daughter of family friends. Since the moment I laid eyes on her, I determined she was one of the most beautiful people I’d ever seen. She was three. She is now sixteen and my opinion has not changed. With electric green eyes set in the perfect face, it’s hard for people not to be distracted by her beauty. This is unfortunate because most people miss her extraordinary compassion and her elevated joy at the simplest acts of kindness. My daughter and I will often remark that my niece, is a modern day Helen of Troy or perhaps an Old Testament Ester. So, why the title?
Because no one knows haters, quite like her.
By middle school she had received more hate mail than some celebrities. Threats, lies, rumors and life under a microscope… Not exactly how most of us would choose to live the awkward years of adolescence. Today, she is home-schooled. Despite the heartache, she’s still sweet. When I praise her, it’s not because I think she is without the basic flaws of humanity, it’s because I know her AS a human. She’s perfectly imperfect like the rest of us and is simply trying to learn how to navigate her own adventure.
Hate on Me…
I chose this song by the beautiful, talented, full figured, equal parts Diva/Homegirl, Jill Scott. My favorite lines in this song are:
1. You cannot hate on me ’cause my mind is free
Feel my destiny, so shall it be2. In reality I’m gon’ be who I be and I don’t feel no faults
For all the LIES that you bought…”
In the first part, Jill puts herself in control. She takes herself out of receiving mode and into affirmation. What would happen if you said, I do not accept your hate because my mind is free. I am free to believe that I am just fine the way I am. I’m free to grow according to my relationship with MY higher power. I am BEAUTIFUL, I AM LOVED, I AM! SO SHALL IT BE. Boom!
Next, Jill isn’t talking about lies that SHE told. Shes talking about lies that the hater has bought about themselves. See at some point we have all been conditioned to think a certain thing is “THE thing.” Only the things that fit into THIS box are beautiful. Only THAT kind of person succeeds. Only THESE choices are acceptable. These ideas become trappings that bind people up. Even people that want to love you can be haters because they are afraid. At some point I got to thinking, MAYBE…
A HATER = Hasn’t Attained Their Enlightened Reality
HATERS = Hate Anyone That Eventually Reaches Success
So babygirl, I know it hurts sometimes BUT when a hater hates on YOU, consider yourself lucky. Though they might not understand what it is about you that makes them feel yucky about themselves, YOU should know. You should know that “it” is that something special that you’ve been given, shining bright outside yourself. Don’t back down. Be yourself. You are beautiful.
